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Editor's blog Monday 11 April 2011: Simon Burns makes his bid to be next Health Secretary

Publish Date/Time: 
04/11/2011 - 12:09

Following Our Saviour And Liberator Andrew Lansley's now-infamous 'empty bookcase' appearance on BBC Newsnight, entertaining and special Health Minister Simon Burns has sought to broaden his 'Dale Winton On Valium' appeal to a bibliophile demographic, with this 'look how many books I've got on my bookcase' appearance on BBC News this morning.

We have already had some thoughts about whether Lib Dems such as Vince Cable or Norman Lamb might fancy a go as Secretary Of State For Watching The NHS's Money Blow Up.

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Let us now consider whether Simon Burns would be an addition to the gaiety of the health policy nation in this role.

Burns was talking about ... oh, I don't know. It's so hard to stay focused, as you listen to a voice that should be narrating In The Night Garden burble gently on and on (or around) the topic. Until he wakes you up at the end, by bellowing "Nye Bevan!", in relation to nothing much at all.

Which was nurses losing their jobs; something trivial like that. And apparently, they have not been losing their jobs so far, says Book-Loving Burns, citing the necessarily retrospective NHS workforce survey. The RCN are using a survey, he added.

Our survey is better than your survey, RCN. Ner ner ne-ner ner.

Which isn't the case, really. The RCN are using a study of 21 trusts' actual plans - plans, we should point out for the benefit of B-LB, are predictions of what will happen in the future.

He might be a perfectly nice chap. You never can tell.

I've only been in the same room as him once, at the post-election half-day Reform health conference, at which he gave comfortably the worst speech I have ever heard. Which he ended by berating highly-experienced NHS managers for voicing inconvenient truths during the Q&A.

If there could be one thing worse than Secretary Of State For the Time Being Andrew Lansley implementing his plans, it would probably be Secretary Of State for Health Simon Burns doing so.